Love Experience Construct Within the Context of the Iranian Family

Document Type : Research

Authors

1 MA student in Social Science Research, Department of Social Sciences, Faculty of Literature and Humanities, Ferdowsi University of Mashhad, Mashhad, Iran

2 Associate Professor, Department of Social Sciences, Faculty of Literature and Humanities, Ferdowsi University of Mashhad, Mashhad, Iran

Abstract
The experience of love, uniquely constructed for each person, is shaped by a combination of personal and social factors that collectively build the individual's social world. The family is among the most pivotal environments influencing the quality of this experience. Parenting constructs within the family can significantly impact an individual’s romantic experiences. Specifically, parenting styles that meet a person’s need for respect, validation, and acceptance tend to predispose them toward love experiences rooted in consumerist tendencies. Conversely, parenting styles that allow children to transcend the lower levels of Maslow's hierarchy of needs—ultimately enabling them to pursue self-actualization—foster willingness for a generative, profound romantic experience. The present study aims to understand how the quality of a person's relationships within the family manifest in the quality of their romantic connections. To address this, we used narrative inquiry method to reconstruct the romantic stories of 5 women and 6 men and collected data on relationship quality with their parent’s families. Overall, two attachment patterns emerged: secure and insecure. Participants who experienced a safe, attentive family environment captured love experience with an efficient self-perception associating love experience with a sense of fulfilment, growth and satisfaction. In contrast, those who were raised in a cold, insecure, and neglectful familial environments, interacting with inattentive and dismissive parents, exhibited a deficient self-perception, felt insecure, and as a coping mechanism, used their romantic relationships to compensate for their vulnerabilities. Results suggest that participants experienced their romantic relationships within two distinct patterns. Those who were satisfied with their romantic experiences and viewed love as a means of personal growth experienced secure parenting styles and entered their relationships with a sense of sufficiency. On the contrary, those who found their romantic experiences detrimental experienced insecure parenting styles, and their romantic relationships were primarily reactive responses to their initial insecurities.
 

Keywords


  1. آلندی، ر. (1373) عشق. تهران: انتشارات توس.
  2. احمدی، ب. (1390) حقیقت و زیبایی. چاپ بیستم. تهران: نشر مرکز
  3. استراوس، ا؛ و کربین، ج. (1390). مبانی پژوهش کیفی: فنون و مراحل تولید نظریۀ زمینه‌ای. (افشار. ا، مترجم). تهران: چاپ غزال.
  4. چوپرا، د. (1378) جادۀ عشق. (بلوچ. ح.ر؛ و هندی‌زاده. ح، مترجمان). تهران: چاپ آسمان.
  5. ردفیلد، ج. (1390) پیشگویی آسمانی. (عبداللهی. ه، مترجم). تهران: نشر فرزان روز.
  6. فروم، ا. (1374) هنر عشق ورزیدن. (سلطانی. پ، مترجم). تهران: مروارید.
  7. فلیک، ا. (1388) درآمدی بر تحقیق کیفی. (افشار. ه، مترجم). تهران: نشرنی.
  8. گرمارودی، غ.، مکارم، ج؛ علوی، س؛ مکارم، ج؛ علوی، ش؛ و عباسی، ز. (1388). عادات پرخطر بهداشتی در دانش‌آموزان تهرانی. فصلنامۀ پایش، 9(1)، 13-19.
  9. گیدنز، آ. (1390) ، مبانی جامعه‌شناسی. (صبوری. م، مترجم). تهران: نشر نی.
  10. عطاری، آ. (1390)، بررسی کیفیت روابط صمیمانه مبتلا به اختلال وسواسی اجباری و ارائه مدلی براساس سبک‌های دلبستگی و طرحواره‌های ناسازگار اولیه. پایان‌نامۀ کارشناسی‌ارشد رشتۀ روانشناسی بالینی، دانشگاه الزهرا تهران.
  11. مزلو، ا.ه. (1367). انگیزش و شخصیت. (رضوانی. ا، مترجم). مشهد: انتشارات آستان قدس رضوی.
  12. مزلو، ا.ه. (1367). روانشناسی عشق ورزیدن: روانشناسی شخصیت سالم. (رویگریان. ش، مترجم). تهران: چاپ گلشائی.
  13. میرمیری، ه. (1390). برساخت اجتماعی عشق در تجربۀ زیسته ایرانی (مطالعه موردی دهه 40، 60 و 80). پایان‌نامۀ کارشناسی‌ارشد رشتۀ مطالعات فرهنگی. دانشگاه علم و فرهنگ تهران.
  14. نراقی، آ. (1391) دربارۀ عشق. (نراقی. آ، گردآوری و ترجمه). تهران: نشر نی.
  15. یالوم، ا.د. (1391). روان‌درمانی اگزیستانسیال. تهران: نشرنی.
  16. Bowlby, J. (1977). The making and breaking of affectional bonds . NEW York: Routledge publication.
  17. Esna-Ashari, F. (2004). Differences in Attitudes towards Premarital Sex. M.A. thesis  in Shiraz University,Iran.
  18. Goode, W. (1959). The Theoretical Importance of Love. American Sociological Review:No 24: pp 38-47.
  19. Grabill, C. M., & Kerns, K. A. (2000). Attachment style and intimacy in friendship. Personal Relationships, 7, 363-378.
  20. Hazan, C., & Shaver, P. (1987).  Romantic love conceptualised as an attachment Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 52, 511–524.
  21. Hazen, C., & Shaver, P. (1994). Attachment as an organizational framework for research on close relationship. Psychological Inquiry, 5, 1-22.

https://doi.org/10.1207/s15327965pli0501_1

  1. Jackman, M. (1994). The Velvet Glove: Paternalism and Conflict in Gender, Class, and Race Relations. Berkeley: University of California Press.
  2. Lee, J. (1973). the Colours of loVe: An exploration of the ways of loving. Toronto, Canada: New Press: Toronto.
  3. Lin, H. (2008). Private Love in Public Space: Love Hotels and the Transformation of Intimacy in Contemporary Japan. Asian Studies Review, 32, 31-56.
  4. Marshall, T. C. (2008). Cultural differences in intimacy: The influence of gender-role ideology and individualism—collectivism. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships,25 (1), 143-168.
  5. Meier, A., & Allen, G. (2008). Intimate relationship development during the transition to adulthood: Differences by social class. Social class and transitions to adulthood, 119, 25-39.
  6. Nielsen, K., & Cairns, S. (2009). Social Anxiety and Close Relationships:A Hermeneutic Phenomenological Study. Canadian Journal of Counselling, 43(3), 178-197.
  7. Shaver, P. R., & Mikulincer, M. (2002). Dialogue on adult attachment: Diversity and integration. Attachment and Human Development, 4, 243–257.

 

Send comment about this article
Enter Name.
Enter a valid email address.
Enter a vaid affiliation.
Enter comments (At leaset 10 words)
CAPTCHA Image
Enter Security Code Correctly.

  • Receive Date 07 September 2016
  • Revise Date 06 January 2017
  • Accept Date 17 January 2017
  • First Publish Date 22 November 2025
  • Publish Date 22 November 2025